Ew!

I'm sorry, but why must some men wear shorts so short that they expose cooter?

There was this guy at Office Depot who was wearing short-shorts that ended several inches above his knees. I was so distracted by that I didn't bother to see if he was also committing the sock + sandal faux pas.

When he left the store I watched to see what kind of car he was going to get into.

Two-seater convertable. Repeat after me, kids: "mid-life crisis."