I've been on a sort of informal family avoidance stretch for the past few days. That simply means that since they haven't called me, I haven't spoken to them. I was supposed to [meaning I told them I "might could"] go to Virginia over the weekend to see my mom. I chose not to go for various reasons including fatigue, lack of clean clothing, and the fact that I don't want to show up at a hospital to simply "pay my respects." She ain't dead. I hate it when people have their own ideas of what YOU should be doing.
Anyway, my aunt called last night and I just answered the phone to go ahead and let her pull that guilt-tripping shit they're so fond of doing. Not only did she criticize me for not going, she tried to give me the fucking third degree about my circumstances. You would be very proud of me. Not once did I raise my voice, or make bullshit arguments for my defense. I think the deafening silences I was creating sort of humbled her a bit as silence is not the norm when people in my family get confrontational.
I told her that Scott and I share a car now, so taking off for a weekend would mean stranding him here. From that information she questioned me on:
1 - how much my Jeep payment was that I wouldn't want to keep it.
2 - why I didn't use the Accord as a trade in (when I told her that it wasn't my car to sell, but rather my grandma's, she basically made it sound like I was stupid for selling it and giving her the money.)
3 - if Scott makes so much money, why don't I get him to pay my bills? (a - what my husband earns is nobody's damn business. b - I handle my business as I see fit.)
She then told me that I should just take any old job and pay a ghetto-ass babysitter (paraphrase) to watch the baby in their house until I could "afford real daycare." Yeah, like those babysitters my mom always left me and my sister at who would keep us for hours and never even give us a snack?
First of all, did I not say that I might not want to go back to work? Why should I go back to work just for the benefit of having a car? Does that make sense to anyone else? Because it's sort of going over my head. If I can break even by staying at home and NOT having a car, wouldn't it be preferable to stay here with the kid?
Next, she suggested that I should have taken the bus there.
Yeah, FUCK THAT. While it may be a three hour drive by car, by bus it's 8 1/2 fucking hours. I'm not sitting in anyone's fucking smelly bus station with an infant, I'm sorry. Nor am I going to cram myself in a seat next to some slumbering, snoring weirdo.
*sigh*
Well, the news is that my mom is out of intensive care, but it looks like she'll be in the hospital for a while. I couldn't get a read on her actual condition based on what my aunt was telling me (her claim was that the doctors/nurses all talk negative and they all tell you different things and blah blah blah).
Posted by Tiffany at March 22, 2007 11:14 AM | TrackBack