And stop calling him your "nephew." 'Cause he ain't.

You know, I've read in one of those many maternity magazines that I've sunken money into that you should never respond to the question "How are you feeling?" with a response other than "fine."

Even though I feel like garbage most of the time, I'm supposed to say I feel great or else open the floodgates of "Well, when I was pregnant, blah blah blah." By telling them that you feel fine, they're supposed to go away.

That doesn't work. Not on my coworkers, anyway. I choose my words carefully so as not to prolong conversation. They still stand there with their jaws flapping - even the ones who don't know I'm pregnant and are just standing there wasting time.

Help.