December 31, 2005
Fear and Trepidation
So, we have a few people gathering here tonight for New Year's libations. I say "few" because I really have no idea how many people are going to show up. I got a firm "Yes" from four. My cousin was supposed to drive up from Edenton, but having car problems sort of squashed the trip. I was really expecting her to be the hub of things so that I would have to do too much entertaining.
I have a bunch of "I might stop by for a little while" commitments from people that I'm not holding my breath for.
Ugh. Well, if it's a small group and we're not too trashed to drive, we can go see the acorn drop. Otherwise....lord, pray for me that no one barfs on my rug.
December 30, 2005
Resolutions
I'm not one for making New Year's resolutions because I'm VERY good at making excuses to not keep them.
All the same, it's traditional, so here I go:
Tiffany's 2006 Resolutions
That's all...for now.
December 29, 2005
Yay, Edenton!
It always tickles me to see my hometown appear positively in a news story...unlike the other thing it's known for.
Bob your head.
So, how do you prevent yourself from going absolutely apeshit when loading stuff on your iPod?
I discovered that I had some change available on one of my credit cards this afternoon, and being that I was feeling very music-y devoted five bucks to things I can bob my head to at work.
At times I can be really indiscriminate when buying music (i.e. my "Hair" soundtrack), but for whatever reason I was really picky tonight. The first three songs I already planned to buy: "My Humps" (Black Eyed Peas), "Buttons" (Pussycat Dolls), and "Gold Digger" (Kanye "George Bush hates black people" West).
With there being so many damn songs available to download, I ended up going to MTV.com and listening to some of the songs on iTunes top 100 list. While I learned that Ricky Martin's "I don't care" is a pretty damn good song for dancing raunchily around the house, I settled on Shakira's "La Tortura" (also a ringtone on my cell phone) and "You're Beautiful" by James blunt.
What else is good for dancing with yourself in front of the mirror?
December 28, 2005
December 26, 2005
A Little Quizcicle
When you get new clothing, say...for Christmas or otherwise, do you hang them up with the price tags still on or do you rip them off before you hang them?
Just curious.
In case you're wondering, Scott cuts his off. I leave mine on. Once those little paper tags fly away they just aren't new to me.
December 25, 2005
Ho heh heh
I made out like a bandit this Christmas. With this being our first year with a tree and all, I fully expected one gift and that the rest of the gifts under the tree would belong to people who hadn't stopped by yet to pick theirs up.
But, lo, for some reason my husband loves me and since unlike me he is paid wages that are NOT reflective of the goodness of his heart, got me lots of loot.
I got a new cheese grater (we somehow managed to break two), a 30 GB iPod (wasn't expecting), a PalmOne Tungsten E2 (which will make me appear more professionally important than I really am), a cozy cardigan, some fuzzy socks to shuffle around in, a cake/pie stand (because I had been turning a cooking pot upside down over my cakes to store them), gift certificates to take gourmet cooking classes, a birthstone ring and necklace...and Scott and I got a Bible to share. Ahem. I'm sure some seriously misguided person bought that out of the goodness of her heart.
The one complaint I have about Christmas is that everything around here shuts down. Wal*Mart is closed. The grocery stores are closed. By the time I got motivated enough to go out and do some shopping for a Chrstmas meal last night it was 5:45. Most stores closed at 6. I made a pecan pie (of which each and every pecan was cracked by my own two ands using a pair of vise grips) and we had a Freschetta pepperoni pizza for dinner.
Oh well.
You can check out my Christmas album at Flickr. Please refrain from cracking on my morning hair.
December 23, 2005
*cracks whip*
Tomorrow is the very last day for you to submit your interview questions for me to answer at Basil's Blog. Just click on the l'il link at the top of the page. Keep it tidy. Don't make me eWedgie you.
December 20, 2005
Groveling to Gap
You may not know this about me, but I worked in an Old Navy store for close to two years. "Wow, I wouldn't have pegged her as having a customer service personality," you say? Well, I don't. I folded shirts and tried to keep my mouth shut, even when snot-nosed kids were blowing raspberries all over my pant leg. I still shop at Gap-family (Gap, Old Navy, Banana) stores because I know how the pants are cut - I don't have to shop around too much.
Anyhow, I've been having a shitty time with a certain pair of Gap khakis. To summarize, I've had two pairs of the same pants split in the same place after fewer than three wears.
I wrote the following email to Gap this email after extricating the pants from the bottom of my laundry heap:
"This message is regarding item 278560 - the Gap classic fit clean cut khakis in the stone color.I have bought not one, but TWO pairs of these defective pants. I bought the first pair back in the fall at the full retail price of $44 and threw out my receipt - the pants fit fine and I intended to keep them. On my third wear of the pants, having neither washed the pants or worn them in any manner other than required in normal wear the area around the crotch split while I was driving home. The tear was NOT on the seam, but at the area beside it.
I should mention that these were a pair of size 2A khakis that were baggy in the thigh and knee - I could almost understand if the pants were too tight.
I returned the pants to the store of purchase a few weeks later and the manager exchanged them for an exact pair (of course, by this time they had gone into clearance).
I didn't even get two wears out of my new pair: I am uncertain of when the second pair split, however I realized it after I got home from work. They ripped in the exact same place - beside the crotch. I am still in ownership of the second pair. Again, I did not keep my receipt. What are the chances that this could happen TWICE? I wanted these pants and had no intent to return.
I'm curious to now whether there have been any other complaints with this style of pants. As a former Old Navy employee, I am typically reluctant to shop at stores not affiliated with Gap - I know what fits and I know the quality. I don't have to waste a lot of time trying on brands I'm not familiar with.
My situation with these khakis has been remarkably disappointing. Jeans and khakis are supposed to be a Gap staple: if I can't purchase a pair that won't rip after minimal wear, I'm at a loss of where I should purchase them."
I'm almost certain they'll send me an email telling me to return the pants to the store again for an exchange (if they're in stock) or a store credit at the current retail price ($19.99).
If they ask me to mail them back for a full refund I'm going to wet my pants in glee. Stay tuned.
Where I get my strapping good looks.
Here's a picture of my maternal grandmother (the one I grew up with) and grandfather circa 1940somthing.
She was 16 when they got married. He was 22. The first of eight or so children came around in 1946. By then my grandmother was 24. . .wow, eight years and no kids and then poofpoofpoof - house full.
December 17, 2005
Naps are the shit.
They're like a drug that you can't resist and I just woke up from one. I especially like the part where I stretch out beneath a warm blanket, wiggling my toes and doing a little "Yeeeeeeah, boy!" grunt to acknowledge my comfort. Yum.
This morning I heaved myself out of the bed at the asscrack of dawn and drove to work to administer even more of those exams I've been bitching about. Three of the six allotted people who signed up showed up.
I think that's hilarious - people apply for a government job and then two days later don't bother to show up for the screening exam. I guess they don't know how long the Fed's memory is. It's not like one of those "optional" Monday quizzes your Shakespeare professor gives every week for like 1% of your final grade. Heaven forgive they should need to apply again...
We're slated to go to a party tonight that runs from 9 til we drop. Something in my bones tell me that I'm going to embarrass myself by asking to leave before midnight. I'm too old for this shit. Right now I'm going to have a cup of hot tea, try to bend myself enough at the waist to paint my crusty toenails, and then possibly take another brief nap before showering and undertaking the monumental task of dressing.
December 15, 2005
Stupid People
As I mentioned in a previous post, in my office we are involved with a government contract where we take people who want to work for the government into our office and administer computer-based screening tests to them.
On occasion, people decide that they really don't want a job that badly and either don't show up or else come in late.
Today was an inclement weather day in some surrounding counties. Durham County was not one of those. Schools were opening on time, so there was really no excuse people could give for not showing up.
This morning, one idiot called in at 9:05 to say they couldn't find us and wondered if she could reschedule. She was supposed to have been here to test at 8 and to check in at 7:45. I told her that she had to do all scheduling through the recruitment center - we don't have access to any information about them.
So, apparently she called them and an hour later she calls us back, irate, demanding to know why she couldn't sign the late waiver form if she was more than an hour late. She gave every excuse in the book of why she couldn't be here on time, and I told her, quite tactly, that these tests take AT LEAST an hour and a half to take. She was already TWO hours late. If she showed up at 10:30, I would have to stop her in an hour, and manually upload any answers she'd submitted. Besides that fact, we log into the testing service's database, and they have it programmed to NOT allow people to sign into the test if they're more than an hour late. These are government policies - we don't make them, we just enforce them.
We're just messengers.
She goes on and on on a rant talking about how the testing people should have told them that they wouldn't be allowed to come late and blah blah blah.
Let me ask you this - do you think if you showed up for the SATs an hour late they'd let you into the room? No. They regulate who they let in and out and you have to beg to go to the bathroom between breaks.
Just like in any college exam, if someone in the room has already completed it, you can't go in - they could have given you the answers in passing.
People just don't want to work. What probably happened was she got up late and needed an excuse.
Pissed me off royally. I had to bite my tongue to prevent myself from cursing her out. If she had called at 8:55 and said she was lost, I would have cut her some slack and get her logged in just in time, but evidently she didn't have the smarts to either use her cell phone or drive to the nearest pay phone to make the call.
December 14, 2005
Durham Community Concert Band Christmas Concert
Here's me last night during the Durham Community Concert Band's Christmas concert. Notice my intense concentration. I was really just pretending to busy so that no one would try to strike up a conversation with me about the weather.
The play list included: "'March' from Second Suite in F for Military Band," "Loch Lomond," "Sleigh Ride," "Themes from the Nutcracker Suite," "Russian Christmas Music," "Greensleeves," "A Christmas Festival," and the "Ultimate Christmas "Sing-along."
I had a good time. It had been five or six years since I've had to play an hour of music non-stop, so by the end of the evening my jaw and cheeks were throbbing. When the CDs from the evening get distributed, I'll try to upload a few snippets. I'm particuarly proud of how "Russian Christmas Music" sounded. I was a bit worried after last week's rehearsal.
Where's my mail?
No, really. I know it's the holiday season and hall but what in hell would cause the maildude not to show up TWICE this week?
That's unfuckingacceptable.
While I may recieve nothing but junk mail, I'd like the courtesy getting it on the day I'm supposed to.
Shiiiit.
A Public Service Announcement.
For all who have been navigating here using my old URL, blownfuse.us, after January 13 it will no longer function. You may still continue blown fuse by navigating to my real url, blownfuse.mu.nu.
Same Blown Fuse goddness: different channel.
I'm just too cheap to continue paying for a redirecting URL.
December 10, 2005
Hot to Trot
They're clean, virginal machines that I'm the first to use...unlike the old ones.
So far the only thing I've cooked is tea, but hey - that's promising!
We're looking into getting a new fridge and Corian countertops in the new year.
December 07, 2005
"Can I help you, Mi$$?"
The other thing I HATE about mall shopping (*see previous post*) is that during the holidays, every fucking sales clerk within a 100-yard radius of you is on commission mode and feels the strong need to ask "How are YOU today?" every five minutes.
I think they're trying to distract you so that you don't look at the damned price tags.
An unintentional Mall Power-Walker
I left home bound for the mall at 5:30 this afternoon. Arriving there, I headed immediately to pick something for Scott. That being done, I spent the next 2 1/2 hours looking for a little black dress.
I walked up and down that damned mall and was even solicited by one of those hair vendors ("Hey, Miss! You want to try our hair straighteners?" he called out, waving the torture device at me as if I was really going to volunteer to be a public guinea pig). I went to all the stores that cater to my professional demographic. Gap. Banana. Petite Sophisticate. Bennetton.
I checked those stores that sell cheaply made clothing for exhoribtant prices. Cache. NY & Company.
I even scoured the racks at Hechts, JC Penney, Belk, and Nordstrom to no avail.
All the black dresses they had were either too glittery, or were cut for a teenager out of cheap-ass polyester.
I just want a plain black cocktail dress that can be worn to work in pinch if I run out of clean pants.
Got any leads, ladies?
December 04, 2005
G'wan and Ask.
Remember when I said I would be interviewed at basil's blog and that you should go ask those nagging questions that have been itching in your brain about me?
Well, here's some impetus: questioning will close on 12/17.
Just click on this link or email your questions to the address shown on this page if your mail client doesn't automatically open.
I'll answer pretty much anything...but be reasonable. Anything regarding the color of my skivvies or how many transmissions I've burnt out are verboten.
Throws in the towel.
I know I haven't done a whole lot of complaining about my kitchen situation. I've been too busy complaining about work and people I work with.
Well, here's the deal: I like to cook. Really, I do. I like cooking foods that people found dry and bland during childhood and make them edible. I like it when people pick up their fork and eat nonstop because they fear that whatever it is on their plate will be swiped by food pirates.
I don't cook much anymore. There are a multitude of problems in our kitchen, one of them being the fact that our stove and oven (see figure A) don't fit our lifestyle. It's one of those units where it was sold with interchangeable cartridges for the cooktop. The buyers chose to get 1 regular coil cartridge and one grill cartridge. The only time I ever use the grill is when I don't have enough burners to cook my met on. It's too damn hard to clean when you're done, and frankly if you don't clean it, the house stinks. The burner unit is less than fully functional because the back burner is too small and too close to the front burner to put anything but a small pot on. That's great when you're heating up some canned green beans but using it to make gravy while you mash potatoes up front is impossible.
The oven, *sigh*. It just doesn't cook evenly, and it's really hard to put a full-sized cookie sheet in there. They just don't fit unless you slant them against the side wall.
The microwave. Well, the microwave is sort of stigmatized. When we moved in it (and the stove) were caked with grease and mold and STANK very badly. It's the kind that doesn't rotate the food and the rack is missing. It grosses me out to think of how it smelled when I opened it the first time.
Wait - not done yet. We have a severe lack of counter space because of the fact that we have a second microwave next to the sink. We have to have the second microwave because the only thing the one over the stove is good for is melting butter.
So, quite diplomatically we chose a new stand-alone range/oven and over-the-range microwave
to replace both pieces.
I'll be able to have a meat, two vegs, and gravy, and I'll have room on the countertop for that stainless Kitchenaid mixer I've been eyeing for a few years. (Oh, bread dough, I've missed you so!)
December 03, 2005
Gratuitous Kitty Shots
I decided that you haven't seen enough pictures of Puffy Savage. Or me lately, for that matter.
Enjoy.
I don't need help that badly.
If you look very carefully you'll see the book title is The African-American Baby Name Book. It's a bit too early in my weekend for me to freak out and give a full-blown rant on the subject. I just sort of play moderator for both sides of a potential argument.
Side A: there's no such thing as an "African American" unless you happened to have emigrated from Africa and sought citizenship in the US. If you do happen to be African American, I would hope you know enough about your own culture to name your kids.
Side B: black people should look to their roots and name their children names that have meaning and that they could be proud of, regardless of the fact that later on in life when "The Man" is reading their résumé for the first time, he'll descriminate against on the basis of their name.
Wait...those were both arguments against the book. Huh. I guess I'm not ambivalent after all.
December 02, 2005
Do what now?
Just when you think you're finished paying or something and can begin spending that money on little luxuries, why do you get another bill (for the same thing) in the mail?
I mailed the final check to the hospital for the surgery I had back in March. I paid the anesthesiology bill in April.
Why is it that now, just now, I have a bill from my doctor's office for the surgery? Shit, I understand that she needs to be paid, too, but nine months later? What were they doing, waiting to bill me so that they would be getting a trickle of cash flow in before Christmas?
Ugh. I really wish that someone had sat down with me before the surgery and said that "Oh...that $7,000 doesn't include the doctor's fee or anesthesia. It's just for scalpels and the paper robe you'll be wearing."
Bunch of savages.